You

I want to write about the joy in my life

But, how can I write about joy,

When they I have temporary happiness

Unless they have two different meanings

I've always heard that Joy is the everlasting feeling that never goes away

As happiness temporary exist on the short terms goals you've created for yourself

Yet, one of the meanings has a true satisfactions that is hard to choose from

We believe in the goals that we set for ourselves 

But we truly don't think about the consequences 

That comes with the choices we choose.

I am reminded that life is an uphill battle to figure out your identity

But what is the identity I have when others try to put layers on top of my own

Giving the fear of doubt and degrading my abilities to think

It is not a person but it usually starts in groups

Because I am different

So in other words shake the dust off your feet because haters exist.

People hate for reasons they do not understand

But, that doesn't mean you should stop being you

You are created differently with a purpose

A purpose to fit your identity in your career paths

Your journey will always end up with a pass or fail

If you pass then you have to continue to work hard

If you fail then try again until you've figured out how to do it correctly

Or simply find a new hobby that you are good at

Do not force something that cannot be done

And do not force yourself to be someone you are not

Do not allow others to tell you what to do

And truly find your own identity

By being comfortable and loving yourself

Remember who you pray too,

If not that who supports you

Keep working hard to live out your dreams

And be the sparkle or the twinkle in your own eye

We love as we live as we loved

Smiling as we gaze into a trace by the joy in your heart

Because it will always be about you.

Sin

It is mentioned in the bible 

A touchy subject that has everyone on edge,

Believer and non-believer alike,

Whether you choose to be a sinner by choice,

Or a sinner saved by grace,

As one balances the other in the eyes of God,

We are all equal,

If I am a Christian am I righteous as I claim Jesus?,

If I am non-believer will Jesus turn away from me?,

If a Christian stops standing by the word of God will he/she not fall?,

If a non-believer decides to argue the conversation of God,

Are they themselves not allowed to ask?

Have we fallen short of the eyes of the lord,

That we can't defend our beliefs as Christian because it offends other people,

As well as aren't non-believers have the right to express their freedom of speech.

Questions we do not ask but choose to point the finger,

We hate what we can't control,

We hate what we do not see,

We hate to hold onto burdens from past and previous events,

We hate as Christians to be conflicted in situations we do not understand,

And non-believer hate when Christian talk about a God they do not understand,

Yet, we are spiraling out of control believer and non-believer alike,

The difference is God is apart of the equation.

My Christian views should not surprise you,

Yet, I am not perfect myself,

Condemning is the beginning of the battle,

But finding peace/love/grace/ comes with convictions,

Deeper wounds, conflicted issues that aren't healed,

Willing and ready to overcome the obstacle,

Healing the open wounds that broke me,

That breaks me,

That has hurt me,

That stripes away my sanity,

When it comes to choosing between the world and God,

As the world has condemn,

But my father in heaven who has loved me,

For all eternity and forgives my sins,

As I repent and build a relationship,

My sins will only be a memory,

There is so much sin in the world,

Everyone is focused on homosexuality,

There are other ones that are mentioned like,

Idolizing/lying/cheating/adultery/sex-before marriage,

lust/guilt/greed/anger/arguing/hatred.

The list could go on,

Being a part of this world is the curse,

That continues to break and divide,

So when we mention sin,

Remember as a believer,

In scripture it is written

To hate the sin but love the sinner,

That is not just implied for non-believers,

But believers as well.

Blind-spots

Unable to focus on tasks at hand,
Yet, lack in understanding,
Of a situation that can't be tamed or handled,
Yet, given the opportunity to speak,
You become meek and taskful to plot a revenge,
Planning to harm the non-violent,
And mask it, with being polite and silent
Without knowledge of the person knowing,
You are deceitful in your steps,
Getting to know them,
Befriending them,
And even having a laugh or two,
But secretly this person knew,
But refused to allow you to torment or bully them away,
They are forgiving and unable to comprehend the behavior,
In which you pretend,
But they are forgiving,
You still seek to plot and steal away the treasures,
The person made through there lifetime and appeal,
The difference between you and them,
They earned, worked for it, and made legit matters,
When you coward, sold your body and drugged up for power, Now.
They do see, what you're looking for
 Because you're unable to handle your personal matters,
But its not there propriety,
As you plot to steal,
They plot to seek a higher education,
One in which you've never reached or seen,
They share a lot things they have,
Yet, you have nothing to offer but its ok,
Because the person your living with will share with you anyway.
They know your intentions aren't good but that doesn't bother them,
Until one day they wake up not feeling like them,
You plotted to take their dignity but you've disrespected yourself,
 Your crime is unbearable,
And its turned you into a hot mess
As you wake up screaming every night,
Irreplaceable thoughts running through your mind,
And unleashed evil bigger than yourself,
You cannot take back,
You look over your shoulders for the authorities
In every turn,
Because time will tell when you pay for injustice.

Plundered

This is my reality
A person, I  don't see,
Who am I, in this persona,
And where am I going,
Lost in the wings to when,
Pushed back and forth for sin,
As the world begins to cave in,
My faith begins to fail,
My life is crashing before its eyes,
Lifeless/cold/broken,
With the inability to move in brokenness,
Burden by the weight that begins to carry,
Not, just physically as it shows in my mentally capacity,
As to where or why I'm here,
Who are my friends/families/ haters,
Pieces of who I was is, lost to never have been found,
Torn by the reigns this pain carries,
Into a no body that causes destruction by the pound,
By the stem cells/by the cold heart that begun to grow,
Spun out of control,
To no end
Proving who I am to put down,
Celebrated by celebration left unliberated,
Turned into a crown of thorns,
Persecution be treating as the delusion,
To talk back, get mad, and loud,
By the oppression, a label that is my crown,
Shameful by an act I didn't wish upon myself,
Yet others promote and laugh,
As I lose pieces of my self-wealth,
And I am called "worthless",
And other names that begun to match,
I believed in what they've told me,
I believed in the hatred that began to open wounds,
The holes that were never closed in the beginning or end,
Healing in unorthodox ways to fill the void,
In many names.
Objects that began to objectify to comprise the injustice,
Transferred into an act for lack of safety into irresponsibility,
Violated/pillaged without complicity.
Homeless soon had a name,
Unable to sleep or move into a career,
Left frozen with new chains,,
Now I have to make a move.
The crime committed,
They began to choice.

Stolen titles

Everyday we live in societies,
Race/culture/color plays a role in who we are
That is called systematic racism,
If I am light-skin, and you are dark-skin
We have to fight, As if we are not from the same race
Race and culture could go hand and hand but it has changed
Culture not tradition
Tradition not families
Society not the environment
Race but not the color
Stop using the term colorblind,
Just have conversations about background experiences
Fact check all the given options,
And before calling someone racist
We don't want to be white because most of there shades,
between the choices of pale or burn.
Who wants to be pale, no one does,
No one should want to be,
White people don't like the fact that they are pale,
So they tan,
If curves are featured on African-American/Hispanic/Middle-Eastern/
Native-American/Indian women,
She is considered ugly,
But if you see curves on a European/white women
She is beautiful.
Big lips, thick hair,thick eyebrows, big noses, ambitious personalities, appealing fashion sense,
beautiful shades of color, and intelligence to match are ugly for women who aren't white
But if she is white then she is beautiful
Women competing by wearing makeup,
Compared to natural beauty.
Men compete in many ways education, body types,
supposed alpha male behaviors, sex, cars, and height
The american dream my foot,
If you aren't white then you ain't right.
They may not say it but it is in advertisements,
through newspapers, magazines, commercials, TV-shows,
You name it, they separated it by color or network,
They have to be separated by propaganda and press
I am not talking about just that but
LGBT communities of,
Lesbian/Gay/Bisexual/Transgender.
Separated by bathrooms and extremist religious people,
Separated by attitudes by the LGBT communities itself,
Because they are still afraid to be different,
Or proving a point the  LGBT lives matters,
And they do.
We should not care because its not me,
It is them.
We should love them and they love us.
Just because a man dresses in drag does not mean he is gay,
Just because a man is a drag queen, does not mean women can't do it,
Or better yet become drag kings.
Drag is not based on sexual orientation,
It is an art for entertainment.
If someone is homosexual is not a disease,
Your just homophobic,
Or by bi-curious,
Homosexual do harass straight people,
It is a hate crime, don't use your sexual orientation card.
It is just as bad as using the race card.
Gay marriage exist for a reason,
because they want to get married,
And classified with the same rights as a straight couples,
benefits and all.
Transgender is classifying your gender
If they get the surgery or not,
If they want to be called a woman or man
Be respectful about it.
Adding to the religious communities,
Christian, Muslim, Hinduism, Jewish, Atheist... many more to account for.
Being beheaded, belittled,berated, bombarded and downgraded,
Based on religious beliefs which are our foundations,
Not our enemies.
Just because they are Muslim is does not mean they are terrorist
And just because they are Christians does not mean they can't be extremist,
Just because someone might be Jewish does not mean they are cheap.
As well as the Atheist communities have the right to believe in something,
even if its not God/Gods, it doesn't have to be the universe or science
Hinduism has many gods,
But people have the right to pick religion based on,
What makes sense to them, not us.
Terrorism can come from any country,
Just like genocide/slavery/ the effects of unemployment,
can effect any county.
Genocide is real everywhere
Slavery is visible and invisible depends on who is looking,
Unemployment is real today and is will be tomorrow.
Education is suppose to be an upper hand,
but without experience how are we expected to receive a job.
What is the true definition of feminism?
I believe in equal rights for women in all spectrum,
But don't forget men can be feminist as well  
If women get raped it is not accounted for,
Just as men who get raped.
Rape is viewed as a joke,
Only 3% of the rapist community in America goes to jail.
People report and feel ashamed turned away by law enforcement,
Law enforcement tells us to keep quiet or laugh in our faces, questions us.
Law enforcement by military and rank
Rapes there men and women who are in the line of duty
It may not be you, but it is possible that it is someone you know.
Do you know what its called for cadets that refuse their offer?
Disobedience/disrespect/misconduct on their behalf.
So women are supposed to lay down and take.
And men are suppose to perform homosexual behavior,
which is not normal in their own nature.
Women who choose abortions
Can choose
Men do not have the right to a woman's body,
You are enslaving their choices.
Whether you agree or not,
It is not up to you
If you are married or single
Men are sperms
Women are the eggs
Women are the incubators
Women who are married should talk to their husbands
Women who are single can choose with boyfriends,
A good suggestion is planned parenthood,
It is not just about abortions,
They have open adoptions, adoption, contraceptives, planning for newborn babies
Stop looking at abortions comparing to planned parenthood
As if its the only porgram they have.
We are given options for a reason
We live in societies that abuses its power.
We live in societies that cover issues.
We live to serve, we serve to live,
We we we we we, well what about you.
You get to choose, make your choices,
And never let society choose for you,
Fight hard and be strong.
Be you, because not one is you.

Black lives matter

Black lives matter but all lives matter
We have a movement for black people to come together
For others to experience inequality
In community they are to serve and protect
Yet, danger finds it way on our streets
I am proud to say, I am black
My life does matter
I am not accounted for many things
I am young, beautiful and talented
A triple threat
Not only am I black
But I am a woman
Not only am I a women
But I am intelligent
Not only am I intelligent
I have carry myself in a higher standard
My standards are to settle for more
Not less
To never back down
But to handle situations in the most professional way possible, that we all can laugh together
Black lives matter is a movement
To say that we as a culture is not recognized
We as a culture are here
But we are not seen for who we are
Only for our talents of entertainment
The way we perform is how we can earn
Someone's respect
It is more to life than sports, music, and dancing
We don't all know how to entertain
We are students getting an education
Like everyone else
Yet, we live in a society
That thinks education is for other cultures
So now, that I am black
And have an opportunity to learn
I am portraying another culture
Why can't education be for everyone
Black lives do matter
Not everyone talks the same in a black community or treated equally
Black lives matter because of the way
We are treated each and everyday
Like we are lazy or degraded
Yet, every one is saying all lives matter
We know all lives matter
But we want to know do black lives matter
Can you really say for the hundreds of years
That black people still ain't being treated
In a cruel unprofessional fashion
The moment is for being overlooked
Stereotyped, unfair treatment, police brutality
Riots, safe protesting turned into hostile situations, you name it and nothing is viewed in the matter a situation could of been handled.
It may not happen to you
Because you're not black
I am harassed for unknown reasons beyond myself, yet your telling me. That I am being
Treated fairly, equal, yet you have no idea
How to hold a conversation with me
Yet, even listen to what I have to say.
So, blacks don't matter
And it will always be this way.

I am not what you think

I am not your token black girl.

I am not mixed with half white or black mixtures,

That define my ethnicity.

I am not your play thing.

I am not your stereotypical black girl who wants to be white,

By any means.

Because I talk with stern dictions that edifies,

My native tongue of where I’ve been,

And knowing where I’ve come from.

A mother who was tear gassed,

And abused in the South,

Yet, still decided to stand by the Activist of,

Martin Luther King Jr, Maya Angelou, and The Black Panthers.

Who’ve serviced in advocacy to promote,

The actions that helped poverty in many communities,

Who’ve open the eyes of Blacks everywhere.

My father who was not served in many areas,

Of the National Capital,

That still determines to abuse its residents,

Based on racial profiling,

And no proof of description,

When we talk about justice,

There is none.

My family is the reason that I talk and I speak,

With good postures before I can stand up,


And face the racism of this sickening world.

Dealing with the stereotypes of black and white,

Knowing that if the whites accepts you,


They talk behind your back,


With fear of conviction,

And no backbone.

Being around your own culture,

Does not serve peace.

Knowing that if the blacks accept you,

You will be known as the girl who talks white,

Who has to fight physically and mentally,

That spiritually drains the individual inside.

Being told everyday you’re not black enough,

As your environment tells you how to act,

Which we were not made for,

Comprised areas,

That focuses on us to become monsters,

Angry at the world,

Ready to dog someone,

We were not made for  these conditions.

I see intelligence in my own culture every day,

Black men and women,

Who are defined by the purpose of the media,


They can’t make the grade,

So they put us through bad public schooling,

And they wonder why we are doing poorly,

In Academics.

But when it comes to sports,

They teach us,


Train us,

Reward us,

With trophies that do not mean a thing.


They tell us you're not strong enough,

So we prove it with our gangs and guns,

If only we were taught to speak with our words,

It is stronger than any double edge sword,

And that’s how we stomp out the competition.

We are 11 percent of the world,

That is told we are overqualified,

Underqualified or,

My favorite, you lack the experience,

Yet, we keep dominating by creating more kids,

And fighting harder to make a living,

By taking any job with no complaining,

It is like they are settling for less,

And they are worth more.


Better to be an individual who is called the token black,

The same one who tries to defeat the barriers,

Who knows who they are as a person,

Who beats any stereotype or quota,

That challenges them to stay in an on going battle,

Not to prove a point,

And beat society,

But because they have the smarts.

To do so.


I expect this world to look pass racial differences,

And unite as one for the means of peace.

But we can’t have these things,

Because society keeps telling us,

Who we are,


And they tell others who they should be,

Plus feeding into the palms of those,

Who want to see you fail and never make it.

I am telling you that education is the key,

We were once farmers, business owners, billionaires,

We had our own stock markets, banks, owned homes,

We went to the finest colleges at the young age of 13,

And started our lives from there.

We did not relay on other cultures,


That helped build our foundation,

But we relayed on each other.

Now, we are turning away from our people,

Who could possibly save your life.

We face the issues of color,

Dark skin versus light skin,

Slave owners could figure out a way to separate us,

But, we should see ourselves as the Blacks,

Who were freed from slavery not to maintain,

The actions of which color is beautiful,

But we are like a rainbow,

Different shades of color,


Who cares if the person is lighter or darker?

We were made to be beautiful.

We were made to unite with one another.

As I see this general statement constantly,

Being said repeatedly,

It reminds you of what society,

Tells a culture what they need to be.


This does not have to be black or white,

It happens in the Asian, Indian, Arabic speaking, African, and European communities

Something that has clearly defined our societies,

Shaping our women and men,


Based on the trends of Culture.

We should be in the grey areas that does not define color,

Social, Political or Economic Environments,

But be the individual and decide for ourselves.